Chapter 509

“Since you hate me so much, why go through all the trouble to come to me? I've made my intentions to
never call her my mother clear. Isn't that what you want?”

I did not take Janette's snide remarks seriously as she was an unimportant person to me.

“If it weren't for her declining health, do you think I would stoop to come to you? If you have a heart,
you would visit your own mother.”

We regarded each other with intense and mutual dislike in the ensuing silence. In a funny way, we
tolerated each other's existence for the same reason—our mother. If Janette was not Alicia's daughter,
I would have already had security escort her out of the building.

“If I have a heart?” I repeated incredulously, my temper rising once more. “Whether or not I pay her a
visit isn't any of your concern. I've had enough of you, Janette. Either you leave quietly, or I'll have
security rough you up before throwing you out. I don't have the patience to be civilized with you.”

“You've gone too far, Anna!” she shouted, thoroughly angered at that point. “I've already swallowed my
pride by coming here to beg you to visit our mother. What else would you have me do?”

“You are the one assuming that I would do that,” I answered coldly. “As I've made it clear, I'm never
going to reconcile with her. Let me remind you that you came to me today. Weren't you all high and
mighty back then?”

“You'll regret this, Anna!”

At that final ominous threat, she turned and marched out of my office.



I did not like to be blackmailed. As Janette was already out of earshot, I swallowed the savage retort
that was already at the tip of my tongue.

I wondered how many more times I had to deal with this going forward despite having already made my
intentions very clear.

However, my heart twinged guiltily at the news of Alicia's dwindling health.

Despite feeling like I could never forgive her, I did not wish her harm as she was my mother, after all.
Though she had done something to hurt me, I could never repay the debt of being nurtured in her
womb for ten months.

Over the next couple of days, I did not see Alicia lurking around anymore when I arrived at work.
Though it did make me feel more at ease, I could not help feeling a little worried as well. More than
once, I caught myself wondering if she was too sick to come to my office.

I tried to dismiss my concern as an unfortunate by-product of the unbreakable bond between mother
and daughter. Soon, my worst fears were realized in the form of an abrupt phone call from Janette
informing me that Alicia had been admitted to the hospital.
“Since you hate me so much, why go through all the trouble to come to me? I've made my intentions to
never call her my mother clear. Isn't that what you want?”
“Sinca you hata ma so much, why go through all tha troubla to coma to ma? I'va mada my intantions to
navar call har my mothar claar. Isn't that what you want?”

I did not taka Janatta's snida ramarks sariously as sha was an unimportant parson to ma.



“If it waran't for har daclining haalth, do you think I would stoop to coma to you? If you hava a haart,
you would visit your own mothar.”

Wa ragardad aach othar with intansa and mutual dislika in tha ansuing silanca. In a funny way, wa
tolaratad aach othar's axistanca for tha sama raason—our mothar. If Janatta was not Alicia's daughtar,
I would hava alraady had sacurity ascort har out of tha building.

“If I hava a haart?” I rapaatad incradulously, my tampar rising onca mora. “Whathar or not I pay har a
visit isn't any of your concarn. I'va had anough of you, Janatta. Eithar you laava quiatly, or I'll hava
sacurity rough you up bafora throwing you out. I don't hava tha patianca to ba civilizad with you.”

“You'va gona too far, Anna!” sha shoutad, thoroughly angarad at that point. “I'va alraady swallowad my
prida by coming hara to bag you to visit our mothar. What alsa would you hava ma do?”

“You ara tha ona assuming that I would do that,” I answarad coldly. “As I'va mada it claar, I'm navar
going to raconcila with har. Lat ma ramind you that you cama to ma today. Waran't you all high and
mighty back than?”

“You'll ragrat this, Anna!”

At that final ominous thraat, sha turnad and marchad out of my offica.

I did not lika to ba blackmailad. As Janatta was alraady out of aarshot, I swallowad tha savaga ratort
that was alraady at tha tip of my tongua.

I wondarad how many mora timas I had to daal with this going forward daspita having alraady mada my
intantions vary claar.



Howavar, my haart twingad guiltily at tha naws of Alicia's dwindling haalth.

Daspita faaling lika I could navar forgiva har, I did not wish har harm as sha was my mothar, aftar all.
Though sha had dona somathing to hurt ma, I could navar rapay tha dabt of baing nurturad in har
womb for tan months.

Ovar tha naxt coupla of days, I did not saa Alicia lurking around anymora whan I arrivad at work.
Though it did maka ma faal mora at aasa, I could not halp faaling a littla worriad as wall. Mora than
onca, I caught mysalf wondaring if sha was too sick to coma to my offica.

I triad to dismiss my concarn as an unfortunata by-product of tha unbraakabla bond batwaan mothar
and daughtar. Soon, my worst faars wara raalizad in tha form of an abrupt phona call from Janatta
informing ma that Alicia had baan admittad to tha hospital.

The news heralded a sense of panic I had never felt before in my life. I did not remember feeling as
terrified as I did when I pictured her being diagnosed with some awful, incurable disease.

Though I did not admit it to anybody, the news of her hospitalization dissolved some of the resentment I
had held onto her for so long. It gave way to an anxious yearning to see her being well again.

After Janette hung up, I felt completely lost in my panicked reverie.

Michael was the first person I thought of. I called him blubbering in tears and he did all he could to
comfort me over the phone as he got ready to drive over to see me.

He must have sensed that I was on the verge of a panic attack as he screeched to a halt outside my



office building much quicker than it usually took him.

I was shaking when I got into the car. I had never felt as frightened as that moment as I twisted my
clammy hands nervously in my lap.

Michael's brow creased slightly at the sight of my anxiousness. “Nothing will happen to her,” he
reassured me in a gentle voice as he reached out to give my hand a squeeze, looking into my eyes as
he did so.

“I've already called Ronan to arrange for Alicia to receive the best medical attention available. He has
just informed me that she was feeling under the weather, that's all. They didn't find any serious medical
issues on her.”

It wasn't until I felt the immense weight lifted from my shoulders that I realized how much his words had
helped. to soothe my emotion.

After hearing that Alicia was not affected by anything life-threatening, I felt slightly ashamed of how I
had overreacted earlier.

Part of the reason why I felt that way was that despite repeatedly voicing my reluctance to reconcile
with her, I allowed myself to become jumpy and nervous at the slightest threat to her health. It felt like I
had failed to respect my own resolve to treat her like a stranger.

“Oh, what a relief,” I murmured absently, distinctly aware of the extent of my hypocrisy.

As annoyed as I was, the relief that had rushed over me at the news of her well-being made me feel



better.

“You obviously care about her,” Michael said seriously without taking his eyes off the road. “Why don't
you try to reconcile with her?”

I glanced sideways at him, suddenly feeling sorry about how confused he must have felt at my
conflicting behavior. Despite appearing to care for Alicia, I could never refrain from saying something
hurtful to her whenever we met.

“You don't understand how I'm feeling, Michael,” I complained wearily. “It's because I care about her
that makes the abandonment feel so much more unforgivable. It is so difficult to convince myself that
she loves me. Do you understand?”

Admittedly, I felt ready to reconcile with her. I just had trouble putting my wounded pride aside.

I might even accept any reason she could have given me as to why she had to do what she did all
those years ago. The one thing I could not accept was that she had given up on me.

“Though I can't feel what you're going through,” Michael said as he turned to look at me with a mixture
of pity and tenderness. “I understand that you must be feeling awful and betrayed. But it has been over
twenty years, Anna. She wouldn't have come back if she doesn't love you.”

I gazed back at him. He always knew the right thing to say to make me feel better. And there he was,
nudging me toward the path I was most reluctant to take. For the first time, the doubt about my own
judgment began to creep into my mind.

“So what even if she loves me?” I asserted stubbornly. “The fact that she had once abandoned me was



still the truth.”

I could not deny the fact as I have seen Alicia's love for me through her eyes. However, it was going to
take more than a single apology to mend the damage that she had done to me.

“Don't you find it tiring to be this spiteful all the time?” Michael snapped, his patience with me finally
wearing out. “Haven't you always wished to experience a mother's love? You got what you wanted.
Your mother is back in your life and eager to get to know you. Maybe if you take the first step to meet
her halfway, you may find it much easier to take the next step after you feel how much lighter your
burden will become if you could find it within yourself to forgive her.”

His outburst seemed to have shaken me out of the delusion of my own self-pity. I knew that he was the
voice of reason whenever I was caught in a dilemma. After all, he wanted the best for me, though I
wasn't sure if I was mature enough to forgive Alicia just yet.

I was ashamed to know that I was being unreasonable. It was difficult to forgive her because I could not
let go of the past, not because of how unforgivable Alicia's transgressions had been.

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